An obese man driving an electric wheelchair in eight inches of melting snow got stuck on Delancey Street last Friday. Two girls were trying to push the man over the icy curb, but the wheelchair seemed more designed for zipping down polished aisles of Walmart, not for joyriding along slick city sidewalks.
I was carrying a rather light load of paychecks and was headed for a bar called The Delancey located at the foot of the Williamsburg Bridge. I knew the bar was closed. I typically slide the business’s checks under a steel door as I head East on the busy stretch of sidewalk. I felt obligated to lend the girls a hand pushing the man. Cars turn at the busy intersection, exiting the bridge and it seemed inevitable the man in the wheelchair would be struck by a vehicle, or worse yet, the girls would be crippled as well.
The fat man jiggled a joystick on the arm of the wheelchair and seemed to enjoy having such pretty princesses fuss over him. I shoved the check I was carrying in a newspaper boy bag strapped over my right shoulder. As I bent over to lift the foot of the chair, the man insisted that he no longer needed help and instead, jiggled the little black control knob and backed further onto the Street. He spun slowly to a corner where he insisted he could make it alone.
The girls seemed somewhat upset that the man would not allow me to help and must have wondered if he really needed assistance. The three of us watched in delight as his wheels spun in a pile of melting slush in the heart of oncoming traffic. Before I could shout, “I hope your fat ass sits there all day”, he got up, walked behind his chair, and pushed it up the embankment. His fat ass and that chair moved as quickly as the cold breeze blowing off the East River and across our cold little fingers. He didn’t glance back to thank any of us skinny bitches who should have done the New York thing and not what we thought was the right thing.
There are so many perverts in this town. Even men in wheelchairs don’t want queens carrying bags bending over at their crotch, even if it is to lift them a little. I felt bad for cock blocking the seedy bastard.