Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 20)
Finding a penny tail side up, isn’t about luck, Capricorns understand. It’s just not worth picking up while tempting the value of fate.
Time to run for higher ground. Capricorns are trailblazers for the new age.
Follow your instincts.
Although very few Capricorns were invested with Bernard Madoff or the stock market, due to a nature of understanding that grasses of higher-ground are rarely feasted upon, it is best in 2009 to convert all assets to gold and stand where things are always safe– on high ground.
Aquarius (Jan. 21 – Feb. 19)
Follow the man who carries a bottle of filtered water when you see him this year.
It’s time to conserve Aquarius and switch from Evian to a Brita filter that fits on the kitchen sink.
Lots of plankton in 2009 for those who swam in warmer currents of greed during this passing migration period.
The currents sometimes flow backwards.
Head upstream if not well vested, return to your roots and spawn.
Pices (Feb. 20 – March 20)
Mercury, planet of minds crosses the dreams of Pices this year. Creative sparks ignite darkened minds. Listen intently to those with wisdom and understand that knowledge comes from within. Guides appear only once in our lives, we must choose to take a stranger in on the first knock.
Aires (March 21 – April 20)
The universe is changing. The Earth’s solar plexis eclipses the sun from the darkness of the black hole at the center of the Milky Way on December 21, 2012, one day before the dawn of the age of Aires.
Give to those who ask of you, letting your left hand not know what the right reaches for in right pockets.
Taurus (April 21-May 21)
It’s all bull and you know it, Taurus. Charge ahead and do not look back. Feed your children after the orphans are filled.
Gemini (May 22-June 21)
Job loss is in the card of Gemini this year. Consider consulting and demand just 10% retainer fees with all new contractors.
Work on a project that spurs faith in others.
Cancer (June 22 – July 23)
By nature, Cancers are aware that stars are not balls of light, but mere pinholes in the ceiling of an unveiled universe. Behind the black curtain is the promise that every living creature longs for– life.
Be Toto in the Wizard of Oz in 2009– pull back that curtain.
Leo (July 24- Aug. 23)
It is time for boisterous Leos to hush and let others talk. Conversation is a two-way game in 2009, when only the listener wins in a mindless game of useless chatter and gossip.
No news cameras around when the president makes important decisions in 2009? Just the press and photographers.
The gift of the written word returns with the roar of Leo this year.
Virgo (Aug. 24 – September 23)
Play the numbers 207 every day in the lottery, in various combinations– spending just $1 each day. By next year at this time, you will have doubled your investment.
Give 10% of each winning to the first beggar to ask for change.
Libra (Sept. 24-Oct. 23)
When one under a different sign than Capricorn taps your back, be sure to tap them back. This is the year of the contagious curse– pass it on and return the misfortune to the one who attempted to place it on you.
Double-back. Times two. An eye for an eye.
Watch for the charm of the Capricorn goat.
Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22)
Tame the sting of your tongues, Scorpios. Watch for the horn of the ox. One may never retrieve the error of the spoken word. Wash your hands and rub them to promote good luck as the world runs out of money this year.
Sagittarius (Nov. 23 – Dec. 21)
Get down Sagittarius. If an opportunity arrives to move South this year, take it. Keep money in a fireproof box under the mattress at night and guard it with a gun when the sun is up.
Spend only when the need arises and always pay your American Express Card on time.